Strictly’s Shirley Ballas has revealed the sad reason she is unable to see her son this Christmas.

The show’s head judge is a proud mum to Mark, whom she shares with ex-husband Corky. Like his mum, Mark is also an accomplished dancer and lives in the States and stars on the US version of Strictly, Dancing With The Stars.

And in 2023, Shirley – who is back on Strictly tonight (December 13) – became a grandmother for the first time when Mark welcomed his son, Banksi, with wife BC Jean.

However, with Christmas just around the corner, Shirley has recently shared that she sadly won’t have her entire family gathered together for the celebrations.

Shirley is a proud mum to Mark (Credit: SplashNews.com)

Shirley Ballas on why she’s not spending Christmas with son Mark

In a recent interview, Shirley revealed that she will not be able to see Mark at Christmas, due to her spending the period in the UK, with her elderly mum Audrey.

Since 2022, Audrey has suffered with chronic obstructive pulmonary disease (COPD). Because of her health issues, she cannot travel and visit her grandson Mark in the US.

Shirley told the Mirror: “I see them five or six times a year at the moment, because obviously, with my mum being in remission of cancer, and now with the COPD, she can’t travel anymore, and I like to be at home with her.”

I do feel quite a big part of their lives.

Nonetheless Shirley revealed that Mark always stay in touch no matter what. She shared: “My son is the best person at calling his mum and his gran. He knows we’re together and he FaceTimes us pretty much every day.”

The dancer added: “If anything exciting is going on or the baby does this or that, he’s the first one on the phone to tell us and share with us, so I do feel quite a big part of their lives.”

Shirley on mum’s COPD battle

Shirley has been open over the years about watching her mother live with the lung disease, COPD. She told BBC Radio Manchester in November: “My mum’s a smoker and over these past three years, I’ve got to witness her being out of breath.

“I’ve got to witness her being really poorly. I’ve been opposite her when she couldn’t get a breath and was choking because the airways closed.”

The TV star also said that because of her mum’s condition, her mother becomes “nervous that if we go shopping – if she starts coughing – people are going to stare at her”.

Shirley said: “So we only go out once a week now, it’ll be for two or three hours. She doesn’t care to go outside, she just prefers to be home which is kind of sad.”

Shirley Ballas has long been a figure associated with glamour, discipline, and emotional intensity, both on and off the dance floor. As a head judge on Strictly Come Dancing, she is known for her sharp eye, uncompromising standards, and moments of visible compassion. Yet behind the sequins and Saturday night smiles lies a deeply personal story, one that becomes especially poignant during the festive season. As Christmas approaches, Shirley has revealed the sad reason she will not be spending Christmas Day with her famous son, opening a window into the emotional sacrifices that often accompany success, fame, and complex family lives.

For Shirley, Christmas has always held a special emotional weight. Raised in a working-class family in Wallasey, Merseyside, she has often spoken about how the festive period represented togetherness, comfort, and stability during her early years. Despite the hardships and financial struggles her family faced, Christmas was a time when they came together, creating memories that stayed with her long after she left home to pursue her dancing career. Those early experiences shaped her belief that Christmas is less about extravagance and more about presence, connection, and shared time.

Her journey into professional dance began at a young age, demanding extraordinary commitment and sacrifice. By her teens, Shirley was already living far from home, competing internationally and dedicating every waking hour to her craft. This early separation from family meant that holidays were often spent in training halls, hotel rooms, or airports rather than around a dinner table. While her career flourished, the cost of that success was time lost with loved ones, a theme that would quietly follow her into adulthood.

Becoming a mother marked a profound shift in Shirley’s life. Her son, Mark Ballas, would later go on to become a world-renowned dancer and choreographer in his own right, but in his early years, he was simply her child, the centre of her emotional world. Shirley has often described motherhood as both grounding and terrifying, particularly as a single parent navigating the demanding world of competitive dance. She worked relentlessly not only to maintain her own career but to provide stability and opportunity for her son.

Mark’s childhood, like Shirley’s adulthood, was shaped by travel and ambition. He grew up surrounded by dance, creativity, and high expectations, often splitting time between countries as Shirley pursued work opportunities. While this environment nurtured his talent, it also meant that traditional routines, including family holidays, were frequently disrupted. Christmases were sometimes celebrated early, late, or not at all, depending on schedules and commitments.

As Mark grew older and carved out his own path, particularly in the United States, physical distance became a defining factor in their relationship. Mark’s success on Dancing with the Stars made him a household name across the Atlantic, but it also cemented his life far from his mother. Shirley has always spoken with immense pride about his achievements, yet she has never hidden how difficult it has been to accept living on different continents from her only child.

This Christmas, that distance feels especially heavy. Shirley has revealed that she will not see Mark on Christmas Day due to conflicting work commitments and the realities of their respective lives. While such separations are not new for them, the emotional impact does not lessen with time. In fact, Shirley has admitted that as she gets older, these moments feel more acute, carrying a sense of longing that is hard to ignore.

The sadness in her admission is not rooted in resentment, but in acceptance. Shirley understands the nature of the industry they both inhabit. She knows that Mark’s career, like hers once was, is demanding and unforgiving when it comes to time off. Christmas Day, for many performers, is not a guaranteed pause but another date on a crowded calendar. Still, understanding does not erase emotion, and Shirley has been open about allowing herself to feel that sadness rather than dismissing it.

For Shirley, Christmas without her son brings a mix of emotions: pride, nostalgia, loneliness, and gratitude. She reflects on the years when Mark was young, when she was the centre of his world, and when Christmas mornings were filled with simple joys rather than logistical challenges. Those memories are precious, but they also serve as a reminder of how quickly time passes and how much life can change.

Despite not being together on Christmas Day, Shirley has emphasised that their bond remains strong. Modern technology allows them to stay connected through calls and messages, and they make a conscious effort to celebrate together whenever possible, even if it means doing so on a different date. Shirley has said that they often plan their own version of Christmas, one that fits around their schedules and prioritises quality time over tradition.

The public nature of their lives adds another layer of complexity. As a Strictly judge and a high-profile figure, Shirley is often expected to embody festive cheer, particularly during the show’s Christmas specials. Balancing that public expectation with private sadness requires emotional resilience. She has spoken about the challenge of putting on a brave face while navigating personal feelings that are anything but simple.

Shirley’s honesty about missing her son resonates with many parents, particularly those whose children live far away or whose work commitments prevent them from being together during the holidays. Her story reflects a modern reality where families are increasingly dispersed, and traditional celebrations are often reshaped by careers, geography, and circumstance. In sharing her experience, Shirley offers reassurance that love is not diminished by distance, even when the ache of separation is real.

There is also a deeper emotional layer tied to Shirley’s own life experiences. She has faced significant personal loss, including the death of her brother and the end of long-term relationships. These experiences have heightened her awareness of time and the importance of cherishing moments with loved ones. Christmas, as a symbol of togetherness, naturally amplifies these feelings.

As she prepares for Christmas without Mark, Shirley has spoken about focusing on gratitude rather than absence. She plans to surround herself with friends, chosen family, and meaningful traditions that bring comfort. This approach reflects a maturity shaped by years of navigating disappointment and resilience. While she allows herself to feel sadness, she does not allow it to overshadow the season entirely.

Mark, for his part, has often spoken fondly of his mother and the influence she has had on his life and career. Their relationship is rooted in mutual respect and shared understanding of the sacrifices required by their profession. Shirley takes comfort in knowing that her support and guidance played a role in shaping the man he has become, even if it means accepting moments of separation.

The story of Shirley not seeing her son on Christmas Day also highlights the hidden emotional costs of success. Fame and achievement often come with assumptions of fulfilment, yet they can also bring isolation and difficult choices. Shirley’s revelation serves as a reminder that behind public accolades are private moments of longing that are rarely seen.

As Christmas Day approaches, Shirley’s focus remains on connection rather than perfection. She has learned that the essence of family is not confined to a single day on the calendar. Love persists across time zones and schedules, adapting to circumstances while remaining constant. This perspective does not eliminate sadness, but it provides a framework for coping with it.

Shirley’s openness about her feelings challenges the idea that strength means suppressing emotion. Instead, she demonstrates that acknowledging sadness can coexist with gratitude and joy. This emotional honesty has long been one of her defining traits, both as a judge and as a person, and it continues to resonate with audiences.

For many viewers, Shirley’s story adds depth to the woman they see on screen each week. It humanises her beyond the judge’s chair, revealing a mother navigating the same emotional terrain as countless others. Her experience reflects the universal tension between ambition and attachment, independence and connection.

As she moves through the festive season, Shirley carries both pride and longing in equal measure. She celebrates her son’s success while quietly wishing for his presence. This duality, though painful, is also a testament to the strength of their bond. Love, in this context, is not diminished by absence but defined by it.

Ultimately, Shirley Ballas’s revelation about not seeing her famous son on Christmas Day is not a story of estrangement or regret, but one of reality. It speaks to the complexities of modern family life, especially for those whose careers demand constant movement and sacrifice. Through her honesty, Shirley offers a gentle reminder that it is okay to feel sadness during a season often associated with joy.

In embracing that truth, she allows space for others to acknowledge their own complicated emotions at Christmas. Not every story is picture-perfect, and not every family can be together on the day itself. What endures is love, connection, and the intention to come together whenever possible.

As Shirley looks ahead, she remains hopeful, trusting that time will create new opportunities for shared moments and memories. Christmas may pass without her son by her side, but their relationship continues, strong and rooted in years of shared history, understanding, and unconditional love.

As Christmas draws closer, the absence Shirley Ballas feels becomes more pronounced, not because it is unfamiliar, but because it carries the weight of years lived, choices made, and love stretched across distance. There is something about Christmas Day itself that sharpens emotion. It is a date heavy with expectation, symbolism, and memory. For Shirley, it is a day that has always represented family, warmth, and togetherness, and so knowing she will not wake up to see her son’s face on that morning brings a quiet, lingering ache that words can barely soften.

What makes the sadness particularly poignant is not conflict or estrangement, but closeness. Shirley and Mark Ballas share a bond forged through sacrifice, shared passion, and mutual understanding. Their lives have run in parallel for decades, both shaped by the demands of dance, performance, and relentless work schedules. They understand each other in ways few people ever could. Yet understanding does not cancel longing. If anything, it deepens it, because the love is strong, the connection intact, and the only thing missing is time and proximity.

As Shirley reflects on this Christmas, her thoughts often drift back to earlier years, when Mark was small enough to fit comfortably in her arms, when Christmas mornings were simpler, quieter, and entirely theirs. She remembers the excitement in his eyes, the way the world felt smaller then, centred around home, routine, and shared moments. Those memories are not painful in themselves, but they highlight how much life has changed, how quickly roles have shifted, and how the passage of time leaves no one untouched.

There is a particular kind of grief that comes not from loss, but from transition. Shirley feels it now as a mother whose child has grown, built a life of his own, and stepped fully into his independence. She is immensely proud of the man Mark has become, proud of his achievements, his talent, and his integrity. Yet pride and sadness sit side by side, neither cancelling the other. Loving someone deeply often means accepting that their happiness may take them far from you.

For Shirley, this Christmas is a reminder of that truth. She does not begrudge her son his life or his success. On the contrary, she celebrates it. But celebration does not erase the quiet moments when she wishes she could cook him breakfast, hear his laugh in the house, or sit together in comfortable silence. These are not dramatic desires, but simple, human ones, rooted in motherhood rather than fame.

In the stillness of the festive season, Shirley allows herself to feel everything fully. She does not rush to cover her sadness with forced positivity. She understands now that emotion, when acknowledged rather than suppressed, loses its power to overwhelm. She has learned this through years of personal challenge, heartbreak, and resilience. Christmas without her son is painful, but it is not something she runs from. She meets it honestly, with grace and self-compassion.

There is also a quiet acceptance in the way she speaks about it. Shirley knows that this will not be the last Christmas spent apart, just as it was not the first. Their lives, like many modern families, do not always align neatly with the calendar. Work commitments, travel, and responsibilities shape reality in ways that tradition alone cannot override. Instead of clinging to an idealised version of Christmas, Shirley focuses on what truly matters: connection, love, and intention.

She plans to speak to Mark on the day, to hear his voice, exchange words that carry more meaning than any gift. She knows they will find another time to be together, another moment to celebrate in their own way. This flexibility, hard-earned over years of separation and reunion, has become a source of strength rather than disappointment. Shirley has learned that love adapts, stretching across time zones and schedules without breaking.

As she prepares for the day itself, Shirley surrounds herself with warmth in other forms. Friends, colleagues, and chosen family fill some of the spaces that might otherwise feel empty. She creates an atmosphere that feels comforting rather than lonely, honouring the season without denying its complexity. There is music, reflection, and a sense of gratitude for everything she has, even as she acknowledges what she misses.

This balance between gratitude and sadness is something Shirley embodies deeply. She does not see them as opposites, but as companions. She can be thankful for her career, her health, and her son’s success while still wishing circumstances were different. This emotional maturity, shaped by years of lived experience, allows her to hold conflicting feelings without being consumed by them.

In moments of quiet, Shirley also reflects on her own journey as a mother. She recognises the sacrifices she made, the difficult choices, and the resilience required to raise a child while building a demanding career. She knows she did her best with the tools and knowledge she had at the time. Seeing Mark thrive is the ultimate affirmation of that effort, even if it comes with moments of loneliness.

There is a sense of peace in knowing that the bond she shares with her son does not depend on a single day. Christmas Day is symbolic, but love is constant. Shirley holds onto that truth when the absence feels heavy. She reminds herself that their relationship has weathered distance, time, and change, and has emerged strong, respectful, and full of affection.

As the day unfolds, Shirley’s sadness does not dominate every moment. There are smiles, laughter, and quiet contentment woven through the hours. She allows joy to exist alongside longing, understanding that both are valid. This ability to coexist with emotion rather than fight it is something she has cultivated over a lifetime, and it serves her well now.

For those watching her from afar, Shirley’s honesty offers comfort. Many people find themselves separated from loved ones at Christmas, whether by distance, work, or circumstance. Her story reflects a reality that is often hidden beneath festive imagery. By speaking openly, she normalises the experience of missing someone during a season that promises togetherness.

As the evening draws in and Christmas Day comes to a close, Shirley holds onto hope rather than regret. She looks forward to the next time she will see her son, the next shared meal, the next moment of connection. Time apart, she knows, makes reunion sweeter. Love, tested by distance, often grows deeper rather than weaker.

In the end, Shirley Ballas’s Christmas without her son is not defined by emptiness, but by enduring love. It is a story of acceptance rather than bitterness, of pride rather than resentment. It speaks to the quiet strength required to let those we love live fully, even when it means missing them on days that matter most.

As she moves forward into the new year, Shirley carries with her the certainty that her relationship with her son remains one of the most meaningful parts of her life. Christmas Day may pass without him physically present, but their bond remains unbroken, rooted in shared history, mutual respect, and unconditional love. And in that knowledge, she finds comfort, resilience, and the quiet assurance that love, once given, is never truly absent.